The Last Straw

Everything has its limit, and my patience just reached its limit. I've been trying so hard for the longest time to make it work, but with other people involved, I really don't have much control over things unless I take on the responsibility for everything, which is humanly impossible, ridiculous, and unfair.

Though it's sad for me to see a dream go, there's really not much I can do anymore. Recent events just affirmed how hopeless the situation is. Commitment and dedication are important in any endeavor in order for it to succeed. In endeavors where a group of persons are involved especially, it's necessary to have unity towards a common goal. Just like a house of cards, everything can go crashing down if one card fails down or doesn't do its part in holding the other cards up.

I can be stubbornly and overly optimistic that despite advices to the contrary, I still tried to believe that it can -- might-- work if only...

But then that's where it gets complicated.There are a lot of things that should come after "if only..." -- things that I can't really dictate and which I have to rely on others to see for themselves. Admittedly, I'm also at fault. I'd like to think that I should be stronger, more patient, more persistent, more determined, more industrious perhaps? But then, even if I become all this, so what? This is not a solo endeavor, and I would never dream of taking it on if I were just by myself.

Words are so easy to say. Promises are so nice to hear. Even words of encouragement are definitely good, but what do these all mean if they're just empty words?

I really feel bad about all the could be's that I'm leaving behind. I recognize that this endeavor could do so much good to so many, but one person alone can only do so much. Half-hearted efforts won't really help much,and those I'd probably be better off without. I definitely can do without all the stress and worries that this has caused me. Not worth it, uh-uh....

Who knows what the future will bring, but for now, I'm done. Over and out...

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Lessons learned:

• Ideals are good, but they're useless without action.
• If there's no will, there's no way.
• Recognize when it's time to give up. Accept and move on.
• History repeats itself.
• Martyrs no longer exist in the 21st century.
• Caring too much can cause a lot of stress.
• You don't have to carry all the burden.
• Don't feel responsible for everyone. They can and should be accountable for themselves.